Hi, this is Teri. I am a third-generation Alzheimer's Survivor and a co-caregiver of a parent experiencing Alzheimer's Disease.
My Dad loved fireworks! Growing up, we NEVER missed the 4th of July Fireworks. We were not the family that rushed from one fireworks show to another or left the display early to avoid the traffic. Dad would pick the display he was confident would be the very best. We would get there a little early, stake our spot, and enjoy our time together.
I love fireworks displays, too. But what I really liked about them was spending that time with Dad and feeding off his excitement. My favorite display as a kid was the 1976 Bi-Centennial display in Austin off the bank of Lady Bird Lake (back then, it was called Town Lake as Lady Bird was still alive) with my parents, sister, brother, aunt, uncle & cousins. I was only 10, but I remember thinking how lucky I was to experience the 200th birthday of our country in the Texas Capital. I felt like I was in a special place at a special time.
After college, I worked in radio, which required me to move around the country a lot. Every year, I would invite Mom and Dad to come out and enjoy the fireworks in whatever city I lived in.
Denver: We watched fireworks displays in the foothills of Denver, just a little bit east of Red Rocks so that we could see all the displays in the Denver area.
Philadelphia: We arrived early and set up at the top of the stairs of the Philadelphia Museum (where Rocky did his triumph dance) to watch the Ben Franklin Parkway display.
Los Angeles: I saw a display at The Hollywood Bowl with a friend, but Mom and Dad missed it.
New York: The first year I was in New York, I was alone and went to see the Macy's display at their Grandstand off the Hudson River. Since I was alone, I was placed in an empty seat for the broadcast. I got to watch Ray Charles perform "America the Beautiful." It was spectacular!
Mom and Dad came to New York the next couple of years, and we saw the Macy's Fireworks from Roosevelt Island. You could see all three displays. The last year we were there, John Kennedy Jr. and his wife Carolyn were in the VIP area. John and Carolyn died less than two weeks later.
Boston: Mom and Dad only came up once for the 4th of July. We found a place to see the fireworks and faintly hear the Boston Pops perform the "1812 Overture" (Dad's favorite song) from the Hatch Shell. It was spectacular, with real cannon fire at the end. That was the last big display we saw.
I moved back to Texas in 2004. Since then, we have seen much smaller displays, but we have seen them with more family and friends. Dad passed away in May 2021, and I have not been to a professional display since then.
Mom asked to see the fireworks this year. She is doing much better after taking Leqembi for four years; I think we will go. I am sure that I will hear Dad's voice in the back of my head saying, "Oh, that is my favorite fireworks new color," "Oh, that is my favorite new shape," "WOW, did you see how many tiers that one had?", "That one had a whistler on it," or "Whoa, that was loud." There will be tears, but as always, I will do my best to hide them.
Does your family have a 4th of July tradition? Do you continue to participate in that tradition now that your loved one is experiencing memory loss? Comment below and let me know what you have planned for the 4th of July. What about for the rest of the summer? Let's talk about some of the options you have when considering celebrating the 4th of July and Summer Safety with your loved one experiencing memory loss.
Just Say No!
Fireworks and loud explosions can be distressing for someone living with dementia. If your loved one is also a war veteran, be mindful that fireworks noise can be triggering and misinterpreted as gunshots or bombs.
Fireworks and loud explosions can be distressing for someone living with dementia. If your loved one is also a war veteran, be mindful that fireworks noise can be triggering and misinterpreted as gunshots or bombs.
Fireworks are not for everyone, and that's okay. Consider keeping the person indoors when they are likely to hear fireworks. If the person is distressed by the noise or bright flashes, think about alternative activities you can enjoy together, such as watching a movie or listening to an audiobook or music. You can provide reassurance by talking calmly and giving a hug if the person is distressed. You can always adapt the fireworks tradition by watching a fireworks display on TV.
Be Prepared
Even if you're inside, the noise and explosions of nearby fireworks can cause anxiety, fear, or agitation for someone living with dementia. Prepare your loved one in advance by explaining that there may be loud noises and continue doing so gently at different intervals. Soothing background sounds such as a white noise machine or an air conditioner can help keep the person relaxed if fireworks go off near the home. Close the curtains or blinds. Playing familiar, favorite music can also be helpful.
Having favorite comfort items/objects on hand (i.e., blanket, article of clothing, etc.) can help provide additional consolation. Consider a gummy to offer additional emotional support. A gummy that provides a very low dose of THC (1mg or less) will help them relax, reduce wandering, and support a good night's sleep. If you are not comfortable with cannabis solutions, talk to your doctor about pharmaceuticals to help your loved one cope.
If your loved one lives with you, check in on them during the night. If they live alone, consider asking a trusted relative or friend to stay with them or hiring a home caregiver for the night.
Keep Gatherings Small
Keep it small if you plan on getting together with friends or family. Large crowds can be overwhelming, disorienting, and anxiety-producing for someone living with dementia. Consider providing name tags for everyone to help your loved one remember people's names.
Parades usually have large crowds of people you don't know. LOTS of children, loud noises, and heat. I strongly suggest that you avoid parades and outdoor festivals with someone experiencing memory loss. If this is a part of your family's tradition, you can adapt this tradition by watching the parades on TV.
Because of the possibility of sundowning, lunchtime or brunch celebrations could be best. This time of day is when there is less anxiety & confusion. Try to keep the person's routines as normal as possible, including mealtimes, naptimes, and sleep at night. Try incorporating a few of your loved ones' favorite activities into the day.
Celebrate Creatively
Get involved in the holiday spirit by doing things together. Examples include creating patriotic decorations with your loved one, playing or singing familiar patriotic music, baking 4th of July-themed desserts, or reviewing a family album or old movies with images of past Independence Day memories. These activities can be cognitively stimulating and help your loved one express themselves creatively.
Summer Safety – Heat
I live in North Texas now. The last three summers have been really brutal for us. Heat indexes well over 100 degrees for 60 – 90 days in a row create very dangerous conditions for everyone. Extreme heat can be even more dangerous for people over 65 and those experiencing memory loss. The effects of dementia can impair someone's ability to notice if they are developing heat stroke or dehydration. There are some simple steps you can take that will go a long way to help you keep your loved one with Alzheimer's safe during the summer.
Wandering
Wandering is a common and potentially dangerous behavior for individuals with dementia, as they can get lost or become disoriented. It is possible that they will not know how or who to call for help. It is much more dangerous in extreme heat conditions, where heat stroke can develop in minutes. There are many reasons why your loved one may want to go outdoors. Being outside may provide a feeling of purposefulness or satisfaction. It may be triggered by the need to escape noises and people or is a response to an unmet need (i.e., hunger, thirst, boredom).
You can reduce the chances of your loved one wandering by identifying ways to support these experiences in a safe environment. Create walking paths around the home and yard with visual cues and stimulating objects, engage your loved one in simple tasks, or offer engaging activities like music, crafts, and games. Ensuring these basic needs are met can also reduce the chances of wandering.
Always keep a recent photo and medical information on hand, as well as information about familiar destinations that are currently or formerly frequented. If the person wanders, you can share this information with emergency responders, expediting search and rescue efforts.
Alzheimer's Survivor TIP: There are many tracking devices you can use to find your loved one. We use the Find My app from Apple. Mom has an Apple Watch, an iPhone, and an iPad. I can track each one of those devices at any time. The problem we all face with any tracking device is that if she were to wander off without her phone or watch, I would not be able to find her.
Water
Alzheimer's disease and other dementia-related illnesses can affect a person's ability to know when they are thirsty, making it critically important for us to monitor fluid intake and encourage them to drink frequently. Avoid alcohol and caffeinated beverages, as these drinks may contribute to dehydration.
Warning Signs
Dementia-related illnesses can make it harder for a person to detect temperature changes, putting them at greater risk for heat stroke. Watch for warning signs such as excessive sweating, exhaustion, hot, dry, or red skin, muscle cramps, rapid pulse, headaches, dizziness, nausea, or sudden changes in mental status. If your loved one exhibits these warning signs, you MUST act fast. Try to get them into an air-conditioned room, remove some of their clothing, apply cold compresses, and get them to drink cold water to help cool their body. If the person faints, exhibits excessive confusion, or is unconscious, call 911 immediately.
Know Where to Cool Down
Many municipalities will open air-conditioned "cooling centers" so that people who do not have air conditioning can cool down. These centers may include senior centers, libraries, community centers, and other municipal/public buildings. If your loved one does not have air conditioning, find out if there are cooling centers nearby.
Plan ahead
Blackouts and other power failures can sometimes occur during heat waves. Make sure that cell phones, tablets, and other electrical devices are fully charged. You can also get a pair of Walkie Talkies from Amazon. Many will allow you to reach your loved one up to 30 miles away. Multiple flashlights should be easily accessible in case of a power failure.
Long-Distance Plan
If you don't live near your loved one, arrange for someone nearby to check on them. Inform this contact person about emergency contacts and where vital medical information, such as an insurance card, is kept. Ensure your loved one has plenty of water and access to air conditioning or other cooling mechanisms.
Most importantly, try to enjoy this time with your loved one.